What the....?!?!
Dearest Night Owls,
I can't help but reflect on how I am feeling right now. Currently, I am feeling drained and overwhelmed. I wish that I could say different because I really want to feel inspired and charged to take on the new day.
Today, I ended up waking up at three different times throughout the day. The first time that I woke up was after 12:00 PM, but closer to 01:00 PM. I remember waking up, waiting several minutes before checking my phone and then finally groaning as I rolled over to grab my phone to check the time. When I finally got to my cellphone to check the time, it was exactly 01:00 PM. After checking the time, I placed my cellphone back on its charger, and played the waiting game as I attempted to fall back asleep. Eventually, I fell back asleep. I know this because, what felt like the literal blink of an eye, I woke myself up. At first, I thought that it was still after 01:00 PM. I rolled over in bed, and I grabbed my cellphone from its charging station. I checked for the time, and saw that it was closer to 04:00 PM. I let out a loud sigh and then placed my cellphone back on its charger. After placing my cellphone back on its charger, I placed my eye mask back over my eyes and got myself situated back into bed. I did eventually fall back to sleep, and somehow I was able to fall into a deeper sleep because I remember my last dream before waking up the third time. I remember this because of how disturbing the contents and themes of the dream. After waking up, the third time, I checked my cellphone and it was 05:54 PM. Since it was closer to 06:00 PM, I gave in and rolled out of bed. No matter how exhausted I may feel, I would rather stick to the set schedule to stay as consistent as possible.
I am seriously pondering the reasoning behind the continued restlessness of my sleep cycles. Is it mental health related or physical health related? I sometimes wonder if I have sleep apnea, but I don't know for sure. I need to continue to experiment different methods of sleep, such as body positioning and bedding/pillows needed for a restful sleep. Currently, I wrap myself in three different layers of bedding and use two pillows. I may start only using one pillow, and see what that does for my ability to stay asleep. The important aspect of experimentation is to start off small as to determine what is working and what isn't working in any given test.
Today wasn't only an obsession on the continued frustration over waking up several times, during the day. This morning, I was super shocked at a response to one of my recent Twitter posts. For those of you who have been reading my posts (I doubt anyone is really reading this because I am not that interesting), I posted a quote from the novel Gabriel's Inferno that resonated with me in a very personal way. Well, apparently, it got some attention:
As soon as I saw the reply, in my notifications, I had to do a literal double take to make sure that what I was seeing was real. Apparently, the actual author of the Gabriel's Inferno series saw my post and replied to it. I am super fangirling out right now! I honestly am really shocked that anyone, outside of my Twitter account, sees any of my posts. I don't know how other people get so much likes and attention to their social media platforms because I can't seem to get the same kind of attention to my social media platforms. I guess I have a real likeability problem. I just don't get it. However, today, I received an amazing response to one of my posts. Today, I am super thankful for the response that I received to this specific post. I am blown away!
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